In the times of a distant past, such follies were known personally well. Wordless companions, tone-deaf singers, lonesome hugs…a list as long as the depth one desires to sink through the ground. One adapts. Put on a fake smile and utter a vague word, in hope of breaking the sudden wall of insecurity. At times one succeeds, pats oneself on the head and smile in contentment knowing, such trivial matters aren’t reason for bamboozlement any longer. Before long dissonance builds up. A self-indulgent lady, mistaken for a glowing mother-to-be… look-alike cousins and a case of lost identity. One after another, a situation more difficult than any before. Such is life.
‘Times have changed’, ‘I now know better’ or so one would have thought. But salvation is no closer. The illusion of contentment foils gods plan to reveal ye nature. A familiar sense of melancholy flushes over one’s heart in due time. A scenario so difficult, one would rather that they melt on the spot. “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”, a familiar phrase for the masses which begs the question….”what about myopathy”. But one digresses. One would rather recede into one’s own mind and ponder aimlessly. At times, the life of a hikikomori feels justified and rather more comfortable.
Oh well…one has to endure and hope to come out a stronger person. Such is life.